Connections

I've had a busy evening of chatting with a few friends online. OK, more than just a few. This evening I took part in a "Deck-date" with Crystal Chappell on Twitter. She calls it that because, like many of us, she uses Tweetdeck. She sets a time and lets everybody know she will be on Twitter and ready to chat. I can only imagine how fast the tweets must fly by as hundreds of fans start typing all at once. And she replies to as many as she can, answering whatever questions are thrown at her. I love that she wants to connect directly to her fans.


I signed into Facebook briefly this evening - I think I've been avoiding it, afraid I'll see the dreaded new Timeline format I haven't bothered to learn about yet. But I like to check and see what's new with family and friends whether I take the time to post something new myself or not. Tonight I was surprised to see that Jill Lorie Hurst was on Facebook, too, so we had a quick chat. She held me accountable for my comment on my previous blog about writing something new every day and asked if I'd posted a new blog yet. So here I am. She is a wonderfully effective encourager and her belief in me has had a much greater impact on me than she realizes. And yes, Jill, I will write that book. Eventually.


Jill and I connected on Twitter and Facebook long before we met in person when my husband and I took our daughter to New York City for her 18th birthday and Jill spent the day with us. Today I was on Twitter discussing plans for another trip to NYC. Again I'll be meeting people I've been chatting with daily for at least a year or two. I'm always amazed at the way these friendships develop with people from all over the world.


It's been over two years since I blogged about the importance of these online friendships when I wrote about Cathie Wagner. During a time of grief friends who had never met face to face could offer each other support and comfort any time of the day or night on Twitter. Just a quick comment or two and the knowledge that someone else is there to help carry our load can help us feel a little less alone in our struggles and give us a little hope.


Tonight, I saw this play out on Twitter again. I noticed that one of my friends hadn't shown up in our usual Saturday night chat for Crystal Chappell's fan club and after the chat was over I found out why. My friend's father had passed away today. As soon as she shared the news I saw our friends, one after another, offering their condolences, prayers and words of comfort. I prayed that she would feel all the love and know that we're here for her if there's anything we can do. I'm sure she has friends and family in her life to support her, as I did when my mother passed away. But how well I recall every word of encouragement I received from my online friends during my own time of grief. 


I know some people think that connecting through social media actually makes us more disconnected from real life relationships. But I think it's like any long distance communication. It is what we make it. 


During the last couple of years of my mother's life I called her frequently. We wouldn't have a long conversation because it tired her to talk and made her start coughing. But I could talk with her a little about things we both enjoyed on TV or ask her a question or two about things only she remembered. I tried to always give her a little laugh or at least make her smile since I couldn't be there to give her a hug. 


In these conversations with my mother we said what we really wanted to say, which we didn't always do in person. My mother had always a very busy lady. If I wanted to talk to her about something I often had to follow her around the house while she was doing some chore or other and we were frequently interrupted, either by someone else or by our own random thoughts. We talked about what to have for supper and the latest sale at the mall and whether or not the plants needed watering instead of saying "I've missed you", "You look beautiful today", "I'm proud of you". But when I called her during those last couple of years, I said what I wanted to say and she focused on what I was saying and we connected in a different way. We made it count.


Twitter and Facebook are just tools of communication. It's up to us to decide how to use them.


I hope I always use them to really connect to my world. 


I hope I make a difference.

NYC: Lost and Found, Part Two

(Part One of this New York adventure can be found here.)

I was awakened Saturday morning by a phone call from, Dominick, the Amtrak conductor who found my lost wallet, telling me what train was bringing it back to New York and when it was due to arrive. At the appointed time I walked from the hotel to Penn Station, arriving at 11:45am, just moments after my wallet did. I picked it up at Customer Service and yes, everything was still in it! Thank you, Amtrak and Dominick! I took a cab from Penn Station to Brother Jimmy's and made it just in time for Jessica Leccia's luncheon which started at noon!

The first time I walked into Brother Jimmy's, the weekend of Crystal Chappell's fan luncheon last fall, I was a little nervous about meeting people I'd only “met” online, although I had interacted with many of them daily for months. This time I felt like I was rushing to a family reunion. I wanted hugs and photos and laughter and lots of each of them. I wasn't disappointed.

I quickly found Denise and Lynn who had saved a place for me at their table. I set my coat and bag down, grabbed my camera and started shooting. A few hugs and pictures later I heard someone say that Jessica had just arrived. She had slipped in quietly and was halfway across the room before most of us noticed her! Sneaky! I started taking pictures as she began to make her way from table to table, greeting people, giving autographs & hugs and smiling for photos. She was meeting some for the first time while others were like old friends, having attended several other events, too.

I did my best to get some pictures of her as she was making her way around the room. I always prefer shooting candid photos without flash whenever I can but because of the low light and the arrangement of the tables I did have to shoot with flash more than I had at Crystal's luncheon. I'd much rather slip in and out among the crowd taking candids than to have people pose for my pictures.

 

When it was my turn to talk with Jessica I told her I'd brought something for her and she said, “Oh, Donna! What did you do?!” She and Brian both loved the Dimples design I'd done with Jessica's smile (I'd sent a t-shirt and buttons for her last year when I couldn't attend the luncheon myself). This year I gave her a “My Life is a Soap Opera: What Would Ani Do?” t-shirt I'd gotten from my Zazzle shop and some buttons and magnets I'd made with the same design. She took out the t-shirt and held it up for pictures. When she said her mama would want some buttons and magnets I gave her my business card so she'd know where to find more if needed. She signed the 8x10 photo that was included in the packets we'd been given when we arrived and she also signed a “My Life Is a Soap Opera... What Would Natalia Do?” graphic for me. (Thanks for this photo, Lynn!)

While she was at our table, someone presented her with a stuffed bunny rabbit and when you squeezed its foot, the ears wiggled. Jessica loved it and kept making the ears wiggle over and over. We're pretty sure the batteries were dead by morning!

Next was a gift of Jessica's favorite Girl Scout Cookies, Peanut Butter Patties. She wasted no time tearing into the package. It takes more than one picture to show how much she enjoyed that gift!

Questions had been submitted ahead of time for a Q&A session and we learned a little bit more about Jessica. We found out that if she hadn't been an actress she'd want to be a meterologist or an obstetrician, despite the fact that she isn't good in Math or Science. She said she does audition for theater roles but feels more comfortable with television.( If you were there, please leave a comment here and tell us what your favorite questions and answers were!)

Jessica's husband, Brian Malloy, came downstairs to our meeting room after the Q&A. Brian, the manager of the Brother Jimmy's location where the luncheon was held, is a darling man who has a fan following of his own as Jessica's fans have made Brother Jimmy's a favorite meeting place in New York City. From time to time he stopped in to see how things were going, posed for a few pictures, then gathered up the gifts people had brought for Jessica and set them aside for her. This time I made a point of having my picture taken with Brian since I'd forgotten to do that the last time I was there.

Next came the scene re-enactments, but those will have to wait for Part Three! Coming Soonish!

NYC: Lost & Found

The first time I took the train to New York City I went with my family to celebrate my daughter's 18^th birthday and found a new friend. Jill Lorie Hurst met our train at Penn Station and spent the day with us as tour guide. We adopted her as an honorary member of the family. Jill has challenged me to see myself with new eyes, to think of myself as a writer, and to tell my stories.

The second time I took the train to New York City, I went alone to attend Crystal Chappell's fan events. A generous Twitter friend (@valluv1) had offered to share her hotel room so I could go to a Venice event Saturday night and to Crystal's fan club luncheon on Sunday. Twitter friends became real life friends and I was amazed that Crystal and Kimmy knew who I was! As I took pictures with my new DSLR I felt like a real photographer again. And once more, Jill broadened my horizons as she brought me into a discussion about soaps with her friends, a former Soap Opera Digest editor, Melissa Scardaville, and a current writer for the Young & the Restless, Tom Casiello.

The third time I took the train to New York City was just a couple of weekends ago. I went to attend Jessica Leccia's fan luncheon, but so much happened in such a short time that I'm still processing it all. Instead of a chronological report, like the one I wrote about Crystal's fan club luncheon, I've decided on a topical approach.

Lost and Found: The Wallet

The first thing I did when I got to New York was lose my wallet. Really.

As I stepped off the train I thought I might have dropped something so I stopped and looked behind me. I didn't see anything on the platform or in the doorway of the train car I'd just left so I went on to meet Lynn (@Ceridwyn2) and head to the hotel where I was sharing a room with Denise (@jessiewolf). When I got to the front desk and reached and for my wallet to show them my driver's license I realized I did not have my wallet.

Oh. So that's what I dropped.

I called my husband and credit cards were reported lost and canceled. I called Amtrak, too, just in case someone might find the wallet and turn it in. I called Jill to let her know what was happening, too, as we had made tentative plans for her to meet with us later during a break from work. Lynn walked with me to find a branch of my bank and get a cash advance to see me through the weekend while Denise tried to get a little sleep since she had arrived on a red-eye flight that morning.

When we got back to the hotel I got a call from my husband saying he'd heard from the conductor on my train. He'd found my wallet... with everything – including the cash – still in it! My wallet would be going all the way to the end of the line in Boston and then he'd put it on another train back to New York the next morning for me to pick up at Penn Station.

When I called Jill to tell her the news that my wallet had been found she said, “You have some kind of crazy karma, young lady!” I replied, “I. Am. Blessed!” The next morning I walked to Penn Station, picked up my wallet that had just arrived on the train from Boston, took a cab to Brother Jimmy's and got to Jessica Leccia's luncheon before it started.

I'd like to say that the wallet was the only thing I lost during the weekend, but it wasn't. I got all the way back home to Maryland before I realized that the fan packet I'd received at Jessica's luncheon, along with the things she had autographed that were in it, did not make it home with me. I put a quick inquiry out on Twitter and discovered that it had been found at Brother Jimmy's, where the luncheon was held, and is being mailed to me! Thank you, Sharon (@golffitz) and Val (@RdBlaz) and Brother Jimmy's! Oh, and my lost hotel key card turned up in the laundry once I got home, too, having apparently been tucked away in the one pocket I did not check at the hotel in New York.

For the rest of my stay in NYC, if anyone around me dropped or lost anything, someone would look at me and say, “It's contagious!” I know Somebody was looking out for me all weekend and my friends took very good care of me! Thank you, all!

Love, Loss and What I Wore

Friday night, Denise and Lynn and I had dinner with a couple of Denise's friends at the Westway Diner, then Denise and I went to see Kim Zimmer in “Love, Loss and What I Wore” at the Westside Theater. I knew what this show was about ...using clothing and accessories to bring out women's stories about life... and I knew it would be good. But I didn't expect it to affect me the way it did.

I think I cried for the last twenty minutes of the show.

It was funny, touching, hilarious, poignant... did I mention funny? So many of the stories struck a familiar chord with me and reminded me of myself or women I've known and/or been related to throughout my life. But I lost it when they put up the drawing of a little girl who had been playing dress up in her grandmother's closet. The grandmother took such delight in her granddaughter's imaginative play and I couldn't help but think of my mother and my mother-in-law and all the times my two daughters had done the same thing.

Specific photographs I'd taken of my girls came to mind, all dressed up in their grandmother's clothes, hearing my mother talk about how much fun she'd had painting my niece's fingernails and doing her hair, watching my older daughter dress up her little sister to put on a play in front of their grandmother's fireplace... all these things danced through my mind as tears quietly ran down my cheeks. And I promised myself that I would do all I could to preserve these stories and tell them over and over again to my daughters and nieces and their daughters, too, now that my mother and mother-in-law are both gone.

And then the voice of the author came from the stage, saying she couldn't imagine how anybody would want to publish a book of her little personal stories. But they did. Because the stories were personal for other people, too.

During the past year or so, I've been thinking about writing a book. And much of what I've thought of writing are my own “little personal stories”. I've wondered if I could do it. I've wondered if what I wanted to say most has already been said by someone else, better than I could ever say it. I've wondered why anybody would want to read it since much of what I'd thought of writing is just things I've lived through.

I've always thought that everybody has a story. And as I sat in the Westside Theater, with tears streaming down my face, I thought, “OK. I get it, God. It's time I told mine.”

And that was Day One of my weekend in New York City.

It began with a wallet lost.

It ended with a purpose found.

NYC October 2010 Part Two

(This continues the account of my weekend in New York City for Crystal Chappell's fan events that I began in NYC October 2010 Part One)

On Sunday, October 24th, my gracious roommate, Valerie, who had attended the Venice luncheon on Saturday, decided to go with me into the city to play tourist for the day. I was very glad she was able to navigate our way on the PATH train from our hotel in Jersey City to a station just a couple of blocks from Brother Jimmy's. We said goodbye there with hugs and many thanks since she was not attending the CCandFriends luncheon .

I checked my bag, got in line for the luncheon and got my CCandFriends tote bag with a nice little button with Crystal's picture on it that looked very familiar (I had made these at the request of @Cubfnatic just a few days earlier). I greeted friends, some old and some new, as I looked around for a place to sit. Then a group of CarBo fans I'd met at the RF Lounge the night before spotted me and waved me over to join their table. My place next to the wall gave me a great vantage point for taking pictures and I tested out some angles and checked exposure settings.

To understand what this was like for me you have to know that I worked years ago as a freelance photographer. Besides casual portraits and stock photography, I worked for the Public Relations department at the University of Mary Hardin-Baylor, taking pictures of campus events for the alumni magazine and the local newspapers and doing all their black & white darkroom work. As a volunteer I did the same thing for my church. I love shooting an event, getting a feel for the interactions between people, anticipating expressions and watching for the shots that will tell the story. It had been a long time since I'd been able to do that and I finally had the right camera for it. I had appreciated pictures others had shared of fan events I was unable to attend and I really wanted to be able to return the favor this time.

It wasn't long before Crystal & Kimmy arrived. @Cubfnatic welcomed everybody and started us off with an emotional toast to Cathie Wagner, Crystal's long-time fan club president who passed away last year. Crystal got a little choked up as she said a few words about Cathie, too, and thanked us all for coming.

I watched Crystal start making her way from table to table, greeting everyone in turn, having her picture taken with them and signing autographs and I began to take pictures. I noticed that with each person in turn, she listened intently and spoke to them as if there was no one else in the room. Some people had brought things for her to sign and she was happy to do that for them and shared lots of hugs and laughter with everyone. Crystal never seemed rushed or distracted as she gave each person her full attention, always thanking them for coming and for their continued support.

Kimmy was also moving through the room and everyone was excited to meet her. She did her share of signing autographs and posing for pictures, too. She liked the special graphic I'd made for her to autograph that said "My Life Is a Soap Opera... What Would Kimmy Tweet?"  I gave her the gift I'd brought for her: a “Team WeBreakSh*t” t-shirt and she threw back her head and laughed! I think she was having as much fun meeting everybody there as they were having meeting her.

Let me say a special thank you to my table-mates, the CarBo crew, for being so tolerant of me and my crazy photographer ways. They were very understanding when I'd stop practically in mid-sentence (mine or theirs) to snap a photo, then pick up right where we'd left off or just wander off randomly to get a better angle. Thank you, ladies, I enjoyed talking about soaps and getting to know you! Save me a seat next year!

When Crystal got to our table it was easy to see how much she appreciated all the efforts of the CarBo fans on her behalf. I loved photographing all those smiles! When it was my turn to talk to her I gave her a “My Life Is a Soap Opera...What Would Gina Do?” t-shirt and she laughed and said she loved it! There's so much I would love to have said to her, but I felt like I'd already gotten a wonderful “Crystal moment”, complete with hug, when I saw her as she first arrived at the RF Lounge the night before and with so many others waiting I didn't want to take up any more of her time.

Some of the best pictures I got all day came when @OliviaGotJokes stopped by our table. She arrived just in time to sample the appetizers and picked up one, thinking it was a hush puppy. It was a fried pickle slice and I captured that moment of discovery in a stunning series of close-ups! Unfortunately, she's more than a little shy about having her picture shared, so I can't show them to you!

After Crystal had worked her way around the room and back again there was a great commotion near the entrance and we saw that Jessica Leccia had arrived. I looked up and saw Kimmy greeting Brian, Jessica's husband, with a big hug and I turned on my flash and fired off a few shots. I like shooting without flash better but I wasn't going to take a chance on missing that moment!

People began to line up to get Jessica's autograph and have their picture taken with her and Crystal. I finally gave in to my instincts and climbed up on a chair to get a good angle and I'm glad I did. That's when I got what I think was one of my best shots of the day, this picture of Jessica:

I was watching for the moments just after a posed shot is taken because that's when people relax and you can often catch some great expressions and interactions then. I also got a couple of shots I liked of Crystal and Jessica during quiet moments here and there.

At one point I saw Brian tap Jessica on the shoulder and she turned to hear what he was saying. I just happened to have my camera focused on Jessica at the time and I'm guessing that he must have pointed out to her that the crazy lady standing on that chair over there was the one who made the purple teddy bear and the “Dimples” design because she turned around quickly and looked right at me. Click! She smiled and waved at me and said, “Hi, Donna!” I knew I'd get a chance to talk with her later because Brian had told me she'd stick around for me to get an autograph if there wasn't a chance during the luncheon.

The line for autographs and pictures was dwindling so I stopped shooting and got in line myself, handing my camera to @Cubfnatic to get a picture of me with Jessica and Crystal (Thanks, Cubbie!). I'd printed out some of my graphics to be autographed and Crystal signed the “What Would Olivia” do one. I told her I had some ideas about using those designs for fund raisers and she said that was great, that they'd be doing more of that in the Spring.

By then it was time to leave and folks were gathering upstairs to hang out or say goodbye. I'd seen Jill Lorie Hurst slip in and say hello to Crystal (wish I'd gotten a good shot of the two of them together!) just before they started moving everybody back upstairs. Jill assured me she was content to wait for me while I spoke with Jessica and bid farewell to everybody. I talked with Jessica for a minute and got her autograph on my “Dimples” design and said goodbye to Twitter friends I'd finally met face to face.

Jill had mentioned, as we were making plans for the weekend, that she had another friend coming to town the same weekend, a former writer for Soap Opera Digest. But when my Twitter friend, Donna (@shallotpeel) introduced me to her partner, Melissa, during the luncheon I had no idea that Melissa was the friend Jill had been talking about! The four of us had a great time as we wandered around the streets of New York. As always I had not a clue where we were headed but it didn't matter because I loved the company!

Donna and I have had some interesting discussions online and never run out of things to talk about. She lives in a town where my mother grew up and where I used to visit my grandparents. We both have roots in the Southern Baptist church so we had fun talking about faith and Otalia and our personal journeys relating to both while Jill and Melissa got reacquainted. After a while we found a little cafe and decided that it was as good a time as any to have dessert, so we did. What happened next was the cherry atop my wonderful weekend!

The four of us had a fascinating discussion about Melissa's dissertation …sociology... social media... soap opera trends and the discussion veered into their personal memories of the soaps, too. (I understand she's written a chapter in a new book, The Survival of Soap Opera: Transformations for a New Media Era.) I've been watching soaps for over 45 years so I loved hearing their memories of working on and around soaps and knew all the shows and actors they mentioned and couldn't resist jumping into the discussion from time to time. I even asked Melissa about something I'd always been curious about. Has the increasing serialization of primetime shows had an impact on the viewership of daytime soaps? That's one she hadn't thought about but I'd love to see if there's a correlation.

After a while they decided to call an old friend of theirs to come join us, Tom Casiello. Tom has two Emmys for writing for As The World Turns, a Writer's Guild Award for the Young and the Restless, Emmy and WGA Award nominations for his work on One Life To Live, was Associate Headwriter for Days Of Our Lives and is currently writing for the Y&R (I think I got all that right!) . So I found myself caught up in their shared memories and discussion of current soaps and friends who were coming and going. When they talked about their friend, “Danny” Cosgrove joining the cast of All My Children again, I loved being able to tell them that I had watched him as Scott Chandler years before and was looking forward to having him return to that role. Since none of them are watching AMC these days I told them a bit about what the character had gone through and the way they are writing the transition to bring him in. They were very interested to know what I thought about the soaps I watched and I was delighted to share my opinions and talk about the changes I'd seen over the years.

After a while I took a deep breath, sat back and thought to myself, “How the heck did I end up HERE?” Sitting around a table in a little cafe in New York City with the former Guiding Light editor of Soap Opera Digest, the Emmy and WGA Award winning former Headwriter of Guiding Light, and a multi-Emmy winning writer who is currently writing one of the soaps I watch! At the same time, I felt like I was hanging out with a few old friends that I'd just met. It boggles the mind. I felt very blessed to be in their company and was in no hurry to leave. But I had a train to catch.

As Jill and I were saying our goodbyes to the others I told Tom that I was on the leadership team for Eden Riegel's official fan club, Absolute Eden. He had some very nice things to say about Eden and said they had good things in store for her. Before we left I asked if I could take a picture of the four of them together. It seemed only fitting that we document this reunion of old friends and they were delighted to pose for me. I think this last picture I took was one of my best shots of the weekend!

When @KiaRene contacted me about using some of my photos in a video she was making about the weekend's events I was honored and delighted and of course gave my permission. She did a wonderful job with the video and if there's such a thing as whipped cream or sprinkles up there with the cherry atop my wonderful weekend in New York City that's how I'd have to describe seeing my photos in the video and my name included in the credits at the end!

You can see more of my photos of these events here: http://ccvenicenyc2010.shutterfly.com/  

You can watch the video that includes my photos here: http://youtu.be/GRbHHvb-Ylo

Thank you, Crystal. Thank you, Kimmy. Thank you Jessica & Brian. Thank you @Cubfnatic and @OliviaGotJokes and @LesliePenny and all of Crystal's Team Venice! And thank you to all of my friends who shared the weekend with me!

Let's do it again soon!

NYC October 2010 Part One

It's been a month since my trip to New York City for Crystal Chappell's fan luncheon and I'm just now blogging about it. It took me a while to come back down to earth and edit all the photos I took there and decide what to share online. But more about that later. First, let me tell you how the weekend unfolded.

I met my friend, Jill Lorie Hurst in front of Brother Jimmy's restaurant on E 16^th St. I'd first met Jill, former Headwriter of Guiding Light, via Twitter and Facebook and finally met her in person when we took our daughter, Jackie, to New York City to celebrate her 18^th birthday a couple of months ago. Jill met our train at Penn Station and spent the day with us and we couldn't have had a better tour guide. Jill has become a wonderful friend and an honorary member of the family. I could say more about her, but I'll save that for another blog post!

Brother Jimmy's on E 16^th street is a great barbecue restaurant run by Jessica Leccia's husband, Brian Malloy and that's where the Venice and CcandFriends fan luncheons were being held. I saw Brian there and he called me by name when he spotted me. He recognized me from my picture on Facebook (he accepted my friend request after I'd sent a handsewn purple teddy bear for Ivy) He talked to me about the teddy bear and how he liked the photos I'd included of it in progress as a sort of biography of the bear. He also talked about the "Dimples" design I did for my Zazzle shop. He said when he first saw it he thought it was really cute, then he did a double take and said, "Wait... that IS Jessica's smile!" I told him how I'd done a pencil sketch of Jessica's smile from a photograph first and then finished it up in my graphics program. He told me Jessica would be at the CCandFriends luncheon the next day. I was hoping she would be because I really wanted to meet her.

The Venice luncheon had been over for a while but some of the fans were still there. I saw some people I knew from Twitter and Jill and I talked with them for a while, then she took me out to dinner at one of her favorite restaurants. I have no idea where we were walking but it's always fun to wander and explore and my favorite thing to do in New York City now is to just spend time with Jill! We walked through Washington Square Park and I could have spent a day or two just taking pictures there but I didn't take even one. I had my new DSLR, but I was trying not to go into "crazy photographer" mode too soon!

After a lovely dinner and delightful conversation, Jill walked me to the RF Lounge, the lesbian bar where the free Venice event was held. (She wasn't staying for that but we planned to meet at Brother Jimmy's again after the luncheon the next day.) We had just arrived and were standing at the top of the stairs in front when Kimmy and Crystal came in right behind us. I tugged on Kimmy's coat sleeve because I've talked with her a bit on Twitter and via email and I didn't think she'd mind but I didn't want to bother Crystal. Kimmy turned around and recognized me, presumably from my Twitter avatar, called me by name and gave me a big hug. She thanked me for everything I'm doing to help Crystal. Then Crystal turned around to see who Kimmy was talking to, saw it was me and she also knew who I was and gave me a big hug. She thanked me for everything, saying she sees what I'm doing, that she's keeping an eye on everything (and I have no doubt she is... she's a very smart lady). If I'd had to leave right then, after an afternoon and dinner with Jill, plus hugs from Kimmy and Crystal, I would have gone home happy, but the weekend had just begun!

Outside in front of the RF Lounge I found Sasha (@Cubfnatic) the CcandFriends president, and @Winwitter and @catikins9 (who might actually be a cousin of mine!), longtime supporters of Crystal. I also met @oliviagotjokes (Venice Fan Club president). She was dancing around and talking to other Venice fans. I went up to her and said "Hi, I'm Donna". She stopped and just looked at me for a second and said in a little voice, "You're Donna?" Then she grabbed me up in a big hug, lifting me off the ground, and said "You're so tiny!" OK, she's about a foot taller than me, so I'll give her that! It was great to finally meet all of them in person because we've had some amazing heart to heart talks via Twitter and email and the CcandFriends weekend chats.

As I made my way through the crowd at the RF Lounge now and then somebody would say, "Hey, you're Donna!", again, recognizing me from my avatar on Twitter. I recognized most of their Twitter names when they identified themselves. I had a couple of really interesting talks with girls there (and also at Brother Jimmy's earlier) thanking me for being involved with this fanbase, since I'm a minister's wife, telling me about the issues they'd had with their faith and their churches when they came out to their families. I really appreciated what they shared and told them there are a lot more accepting "church people" like me around, you just don't hear as much about them as the anti-gay ones.

I also met Leslie Penny, Crystal's publicist and Cindy Tingley, who is part of the technical/website part of Team Venice (aka "Team WeFixSh*t"). They found me before I had a chance to look for them and introduced themselves. They were very gracious and I was delighted to meet them. Each person I met who works closely with Crystal was really as sweet as could be. Very welcoming, too, putting everybody at ease, making sure everything was taken care of at the events. And all my new friends took very good care of me as I was looking for the lady who was letting me share her hotel room. We had planned to meet there but as it turned out, she'd gone on to the hotel. But my new friend and native New Yorker, Betty, got a cab for me (thank you, Betty!) and it whisked me away to the hotel where I met my very generous roommate, Valerie. We stayed up talking for at least a couple more hours about Otalia, Guiding Light, Venice, politcs, religion, and horse farms (she manages one in Kentucky)! 

This only covers my first few hours in New York City that weekend and there's plenty more come! But for now, I'll leave you with a few of the photos I took at the RF Lounge. I decided to shoot with available light as much as possible to try to capture the feel of the place and show what it looked like if you were really there.

 

 

Daytime Emmys 2010

I don't pretend to know how the votes are determined for awards shows. There's no accounting for taste as evidenced by the many shows I've loved that have been cancelled. And any given year, for any category of any awards show, there are no doubt several nominees who are deserving of any particular award and probably a few deserving of nominations who were neglected.

But I still wanted to see Crystal Chappell and Beth Chamberlin win Emmys last night.

I've been a fan of Crystal's since she was on One Life to Live as Maggie Carpenter. Her character was memorable because she wasn't a typical soap heroine and she played the character differently than most soap actresses would have. She was more real and I loved that. I was sorry when she left the show. But I did not follow her to Guiding Light when she moved on to that soap. I watched All My Children and One Life to Live whenever I could and didn't want to add more at the time.

It wasn't until February of 2009 that I watched Guiding Light for the first time because some of my online friends had told me about the wonderful way the story of the relationship of Olivia & Natalia was being played out on that show. I decided I'd tune in and see what Crystal was up to and maybe I'd watch, just for her scenes.

What I saw took my breath away. It was the day when Olivia was in a panic about Phillip coming back to town and Natalia had to get right up in her face to help her calm down. Grasping her hands and making Olivia look her right in the eye, Natalia told her "Trust me. We won't let anything happen to your daughter." I was amazed at the intensity between Crystal Chappell and Jessica Leccia and with the way the production style enhanced the story, bringing the viewer right into the room with the characters in a way that other soaps did not. I was sold, a confirmed "Otalia" fan.

What really surprised me, though, was what happened when I watched the rest of the show. The story was all about Coop's death. Now, I didn't know who Coop was or what his relationship was to other characters in the scenes or who they were to each other. Mother, daughter, sister, son, etc. didn't matter to me yet. I knew I wasn't crazy about the green walls of the hospital and the cheap look of the sets, but I didn't notice that for long. I was completely swept up in the remarkable performances of the actors. I didn't know who Buzz was or what his history with his son was all about, but I hurt for him as he watched his son die. I didn't know who Beth was or what had happened between her and Coop before that day, but my heart broke for her. I wanted to tune in the next day to make sure she'd be okay and to see how she and Buzz would rebuild their lives after such a profound loss. Again, the production model put me right in the middle of the scene and brought it all home to me much more effectively than the traditional style of other shows.

I was a Guiding Light fan.

I never missed a day of the show after that and was continually impressed by the quality of the writing, the performances of the actors and the creativity of the producers and directors as they brought us the show in new and different ways, challenged by their limited budget. That they were all able to present such compelling stories, such memorable characters, day after day under such constraints is remarkable. Other shows with many times their budget can't seem to get it right.

Which brings me to the Daytime Emmys that aired last night.

I do appreciate the fact that somebody, anybody, was able to bring us the Daytime Emmys and on a major network, too. But it was still sad to see that no network bothered to show any red carpet footage of this major industry event. It was also sad that there was no memorial segment to give tribute to stars like Frances Reid, James Mitchell and Helen Wagner after all the years they have entertained and comforted and challenged us.

I have always looked forward to seeing a glimpse of performers on shows I don't usually watch when the nominees are presented, but last night, no clips were shown as the names were announced. Instead we had a commercial for the city of Las Vegas and the travel industry. I'm glad they paid tribute to Dick Clark, a man who has truly changed the industry. More than just American Bandstand, he has produced numerous game shows that have aired on daytime television and this program was not just about soap operas. But I wonder if cutting just a bit from this segment would have left enough time for a decent tribute to As The World Turns, a show that has been a constant for CBS and millions of viewers for over 50 years. The tribute that was presented was less than Guiding Light received last year, which wasn't nearly enough. And although I hated the way the ovation for the cast of Guiding Light was rudely cut short by a commercial break last year, at least they were allowed to take the stage and be recognized by their peers. Not As The World Turns.

I was delighted to see Agnes Nixon honored and although I would love to have seen more time given to this segment I thought they made the most of the time they had. Susan Lucci's emotional speech on behalf of this amazing woman who had literally made all the difference in her life was perfect. And to see Agnes herself stand on the stage and deliver her own (beautifully written, of course!) acceptance speech brought a tear to my eye.

But I still would have liked to see Crystal Chappell win an Emmy last night.

Every soap opera fan can name two or three unforgettable moments in their favorite soaps, performances that are seared into our memories, some because of the pivotal point in the story, some due to the actor's performances, or maybe both. I think the one scene that has been played over and over again as an example of the best soaps have to offer is the scene of Karen Wolek's meltdown on the witness stand, as played by Judith Light on One Life To Live, a scene that is still used in acting classes.

Crystal Chappell's performance as Olivia Spencer, finally declaring her love to Natalia is one of the most riveting performances I've seen on television, daytime or primetime. I read the spoilers, I knew it was going to happen, I could feel the tension building during the scene. But when she screamed "I'm in love with you" I still came up out of my chair and screamed, too. And the way her hand shook as she said it again, this time with a whisper, laid bare the soul of this powerful woman, suddenly powerless in the face of true love.

Crystal connected powerfully with the hearts of the viewers as she portrayed Olivia Spencer, one of the genres most memorable characters. And isn't that what actors are supposed to do?

A Daddy Story

Once upon a time when I was a little girl my daddy told me a story.

It was bedtime and he stooped down while I climbed up on the couch and reached my arms up as high as I could, all the way up to his shoulders. He grabbed my hands and pulled me up the rest of the way and I wrapped my arms around his neck and peaked over his shoulder as he gave me a piggy back ride down the hall and around the corner all the way to my room and swung me around to land softly in the middle of the great big bed I shared with my older sister. And when I was snuggled under the quilt my grandmother had made he began the story in his slow Texas drawl with that rumbling baritone voice of his....

O-o-o-nce upon a ti-i-i-me ....when I-I-I-I was a little bo-o-oy....

I was transported to a different place and time and tried to imagine what the world looked like through my father's eyes when he was young. The story was always about something silly that happened to him and it always ended with a giggle.

And I went to sleep feeling safe and warm and the world was full of fun.


I thought a lot about my daddy as Father's Day approached. Not only because of Father's Day, but because he'd just told us he'd been diagnosed with follicular lymphoma and we were waiting to find out more details about his condition.

I had just made a donation in support of Crystal Chappell and Michelle Carter as they ran a half-marathon to help raise funds for Leukemia/Lymphoma research when I heard about this. At the time I was thinking of my neice who was diagnosed with Leukemia when she was four. She just got her masters degree and started a new job in her field. I had no idea my father would be facing this in only a matter of days.

I typed the news of Dad's diagnosis into Twitter and Facebook, reaching out to friends I talk to every day online to share my concerns with them and ask for prayers. I was overwhelmed by the response. In a matter of minutes people all over the world were praying for my dad. Hundreds of people, from all walks of life, offered me their support and I'm grateful for each one of them and the many ways they have blessed me. During the next few days, as we waited for more news, they continued to ask about him and offer me encouragement.

There are few things my father enjoys more than meeting people and making new friends. I can't count the number of times I waited with my family, long after a church service or banquet had concluded, while Dad was still talking with someone, hearing his booming laughter ring out even as the lights were being turned off in the building. Well, usually, the others were waiting in the car while I was tagging along with Dad because I wanted to meet them, too! Maybe it was on one of these occasions when he told me to live life on tip toe, like a little kid peering over the crowd at the parade to see what all the excitement is about.

People and their stories fascinate Dad and he's been collecting them both all his life. It's only fitting that he's on Twitter and Facebook now. Not many almost-81-year-olds can say that, I'll bet.

I remember when my dad first told me he thought I could be a writer. I don't recall how the conversation started exactly. We were driving home from church and I was leaning up from the back seat, peaking over his shoulder as he drove. He looked at me in the rear view mirror as though he'd never considered the possibility before and said, "I think you'd be a good writer. Yeah, I can see you doing that!" He talked about how I noticed things and that's something a writer does.

Now he says he shudders to think of what stories I might tell about him in that book I'll write someday!


On the Friday before Father's Day, my brother called me. He was visiting Dad and got him on the phone with me and my sister so we could all hear the oncologist's report at once. This story has a happy ending. Dad's lymphoma is the "easily manageable, slow growing kind". They'll do an MRI and CT scan, just to be sure, but no treatment is required. He'll go back in six months for a check-up and they'll keep an eye on him.


Once again, we listened as Dad told us his story.

And there was laughter.

And I went to sleep feeling safe and warm

... and the world is full of fun.


I can see it if I stand on tip toe.

Soapy Surprises

People say soap operas are so predictable. Love triangles, babies stolen and switched, custody battles, mysterious doppelgangers and who-gets-resurrected-from-the-dead-this-time storylines.

Unfortunately the cancellation of soaps was all too predictable the past year or so as we saw the plug pulled first on Guiding Light and then As The World Turns. With so much at stake I hate to see the quality of the writing deteriorate on my favorite shows.

All My Children has been in a slump for quite a while now, and that’s putting it kindly. I was one voice in a chorus of thousands who rejoiced when the last headwriter was fired (I don’t even want to mention his name). I’ve been pleased to see characters beginning to sound more like themselves and stories starting to hold my interest more.

Some things about the episode featuring Palmer Cortlandt’s memorial last week were predictable. The soap press had already announced the returns of key veteran actors and there were sure to be flashbacks. I’ve seen memorial tributes on soaps before so I had an idea of what to expect.

But what surprised me was that AMC got it right. Every beat of the story was right on the money. I couldn’t look away. I don’t usually get teary-eyed when I watch these things but when Nina looked up from her candle and said “I love you, Father” I just about lost it. I grabbed a tissue and thought I’d coast on through the last few seconds and then they did it to me again.

Dixie welcomed Palmer into heaven.

I confess that I love reading soap spoilers and I know all the best places to find them online, but I don’t think I’d heard any hints about Dixie making an appearance in this episode. What a perfect ending to a perfect memorial for an extraordinary character and actor. Thank you, James Mitchell for being Palmer Cortlandt all these years.

This was a week steeped in the heritage of soaps as we also saw David Canary winding down his long career on AMC. Again, the writing was good, the performances stellar and how wonderful it was to watch Brooke and Adam together again. And thank you, AMC for giving us one last tender/snarky scene with Brooke and Erica!


My week had one more soapy surprise. I found out my cousin is a big soap fan, too!

I’d been reading reports and seeing photos of friends of mine who attended a Days of Our Lives fan event in Dallas last weekend and enjoying the show through their eyes. So when my aunt phoned me and mentioned during our conversation that Elizabeth was in Dallas for a soap event last weekend, I knew just what event she was talking about. Knowing that she’d won an auction for one of the stars directors chairs I knew I’d find a photo posted online, and I did.


Soap operas are all about relationships, love and family. Somehow it seems fitting that I'd reconnect with my cousin because of a soap opera since generations of women in our family have watched them together, starting with The Guiding Light on radio.


I wonder what our daughters will watch with their daughters….?

Aude Aliquid Dignum ("Dare Something Worthy")

A few weeks ago I wrote about a friend of mine who went to Haiti with a medical relief team in the aftermath of the devastating earthquake. I was inspired to find a way to help and decided to donate my proceeds from my "My Life Is A Soap Opera..." Zazzle products to Doctors Without Borders in her honor.

Since I posted that blog entry I've been tweeting links to those products daily with information about this fund raising effort.

Crystal Chappell was kind enough to show her support by retweeting my links to products featuring her character, Carly Manning, from Days Of Our Lives, one I did for her husband, Michael Sabatino's character, Alan and others. I was also retweeted by Kim Turrisi, Nadia Bjorlin, and other members of Team Venice.

My links were also retweeted by Eden Riegel (ex-Bianca, AMC & new Heather, Y&R), Carolyn Hennessy (Diane, General Hospital), Martha Byrne (ex-Lily, As The World Turns and creator of the webseries Gotham), and Nancy Lee Grahn (Alexis, General Hospital) and then retweeted by people who follow them on Twitter.

Special thanks to soap opera bloggers We Love Soaps, SoapTown USA, and Soap Opera Network for helping to spread the word, too. And a special shout out to Destini of the Big Purple Dreams message board and OutViews.com for her many retweets in support of this project!

My proceeds for "My Life Is A Soap Opera..." products came to a total of $80 and as I tweeted about that last night I began to get tweets from others who wanted contribute, some with matching donations. Within just a couple of hours, the total amount gathered in this fund raising effort came to $415! If you'd like to see what this money can do, read this.

There were many, many individuals who helped spread the word about this fund raiser on Twitter and other places, too, and I couldn't possibly name them all. I hope that you will accept this collective "Thank you!" from the bottom of my heart! My friend who inspired all of this in the first place is currently unavailable for comment but I can't wait till she hears how it all turned out!*

Stay tuned...maybe I'll do another fund raiser someday!



*My thanks to @drcrusher39 for her sacrifice and service and special thanks also to @DrLisaThompson for who helped encourage this effort from the beginning.

ADDENDUM, 3/20/10

I got the following message from my friend, @drcrusher39 on Twitter, who inspired this fund raiser:

@donnadpool thanks for all your efforts! I made a $500 donation to match. Luv u!

She also mentioned that she's back in Haiti for a while "...to help a friend." She took her sisters and their husbands with her this time.

Did I mention that she's an amazing lady?

So, that brings the total for this fund raiser to $915.00! Just a few soap opera fans, trying to make a difference in the world!

It's Only a Soap Opera ...for Haiti

I have a friend, a doctor, who has been working with the relief efforts in Haiti the past few weeks. I've actually never met her in person. We met on Twitter because of our common interest in a soap opera. Over the past few months we've shared laughs and observations on parenting and seen each other through the illness and death of loved ones. If anyone says that online friends aren't real friends, I beg to differ.

My friend will be leaving Haiti in a matter of hours and others will take up the work there as it will surely continue for the foreseeable future. I was thinking of what I could possibly do to help the cause. I’m not a doctor and I’m never going to have much spare cash to give to relief efforts, either. But I think I’ve come up with something that could make a difference and at the same time honor my friend and the work she’s been doing with Doctors Without Borders.

I came up with a series of designs a few months ago that I’ve expanded into a full line of products in my Zazzle shop. It started with the phrase “My life is a soap opera…What would Erica Do?” That’s referring, of course, to Erica Kane, the character on All My Children, played so beautifully by Susan Lucci for the past 40 years. I came up with some other phrases, all beginning with “My life is a soap opera…”, adding other characters from Guiding Light, One Life to Live, General Hospital, and the Young & the Restless.

Recently when Crystal Chappell (Carly Manning/DOOL, Olivia Spencer/GL) was on The Bonnie Hunt Show, Bonnie did a comedy bit during the opening of the show, playing her own evil twin who was aghast at the awful things Crystal’s character had done on Days of Our Lives. Crystal picked up on that during her interview, too, and they had a good laugh. (You can see a clip of the interview here.)

The next day when Crystal was on Twitter I sent her the link to this mug:

My Life is a Soap Opera #2 Mug by donnapool

Crystal saw it and tweeted back, “Hilarious! I love it!” Apparently quite a few people took a look at my Twitter profile page to see what I’d said to her that was so hilarious and clicked on that link, too, because that mug was among the Top 10 Most Viewed Mugs on Zazzle that day!

My conclusions... you can reach a lot of people through Twitter and there are a lot of soap opera fans out there.

So, here’s what I’ve decided to do. From now through the end of February, I will be tweeting links to all my Zazzle products in the “My Life Is A Soap Opera…” line and hopefully my fellow soap opera fans will be retweeting them. I will keep track of all the sales of those items and send all my proceeds to Doctors Without Borders to be used in their relief efforts in Haiti.

I know that every dollar makes a difference in Haiti right now. Using these designs for a fund-raising project like this makes sense because so many soap opera stars go out of their way to get involved in charity projects. For example, recently, Nancy Lee Grahn got on the phone and gathered several of her soap star friends on very short notice to meet fans in person at the Rose Bowl and take donations for Haiti. (I have a “…What Would Alexis Do?” design in my Zazzle shop for the character she plays on General Hospital.)

And who knows, maybe I’ll find some other soap fans out there who will offer to match the amount I bring in and Doctors Without Borders will benefit even more.

So look for me on Twitter… I’m DonnaDPool …and if you see my tweets with these links, please take a look, and if you like what you see and want to buy it, know that all of my earnings from each sale (above Zazzle’s cost for producing the item) will be going to help the people of Haiti. I’ll be adding new items throughout the month. Oh, and I do take requests so if your favorite soap character isn’t represented, just leave a comment here.

I’ll be sure to keep you updated here on this blog.

Thank you.

The Afterglow Lives On ...And On

This weekend Guiding Light fans will gather in Atlanta for a second "So Long Springfield" event and in a few weeks, they'll converge on Las Vegas for another one. Thinking of my friends who are planning on attending these events reminded me that I forgot to report on the events of October 9-11, 2009 in New York City, so here goes....


Although I was not able to attend the Guiding Light Fan Club Luncheon I felt like a part of me was there. Quite a few online friends of mine were there and also attended Crystal Chappell's Fan Club luncheon the next day and they made sure I was well represented.



I did a big custom button order for the Big Purple Dreams message board for Otalia fans, turning out 200 commemorative buttons to be given out to members attending these events, plus another 200 of my "Afterglow" buttons.





These buttons were to be given out at two events on Friday and Saturday nights, October 9th & 10th but so many Big Purple Dreamers showed up that they ran out of the buttons on the first night! (That's Liron Cohen, aka @Sunshineliron on the far left in this picture, someone who may be familiar to some readers of this blog.)







My friends also offered to deliver something special to the Guiding Light actors at the Fan Club event so I made my 1 inch "Afterglow" buttons and sent enough so every actor would get one. I was told each actor present received theirs and greatly appreciated them, too. Here is Jennifer Roszell (Eleni) with her button.








Then for a few of the GL actresses I had been interacting with on Twitter I made an "Afterglow" pocket mirror to go along with their buttons and also included a "Team Otalia" button, to thank them for their support of that storyline.








In this picture of a fan (Hi, Tori!) with Beth Chamberlin (Beth) and Tina Sloan (Lillian) you can see Beth's pocket mirror on the table in front of her. Later on Twitter, Beth & Tina both thanked me. Beth said "love, love, love the afterglow compact. Thank you!" and "I got one of your great compacts & recognized your name. You should sell via the glfc." Twitter has been a wonderful way to maintain contact with Guiding Light actors we miss seeing on TV and to find out what they're doing now. I've included links to Beth & Tina's latest projects here.